Chapter 99 Alyssa 1 plaster a small smile on my face , trying to restore some semblance of peace .
This place is too beautiful for all this negative energy , and I doubt Mom and all the others resting here appreciate it .
You didnt miss anything I say to Niko , though the look on his face as he studies King and Gray , makes it clear he knows exactly what happened .
Its not like Gray hasnt been acting like a loose cannon since he got off his meds .
I pick up Moms bouquet from the ground , brushing a petal with my thumb before grabbing Grays hand .
Cmon , Grayson .
The boys can give us a little privacy while you show me where Mom is .
King growls low in his throat , his eyes burning into Gray , but I meet his gaze with a pointed look .
Ill be okay , baby .
I promise him , softening my tone .
Maybe you guys can show Zuri some of the pretty flowers Gray pulls his hand from mine with an exaggerated huff .
Why are we holding hands ? What are we , in Kindergarten ? he grumbles before walking off .
It should hurt my feelings , but I know my brother .
Hes the ruthless president of the Crimson Reapers , and God forbid anyone see him holding his little sisters hand I throw King a reassuring smile , hoping its enough to keep him from losing his shit again .
Then , I follow my brother across the clearing Gray stops near a patch of grass beneath a large tree .
The sight of Moms pink tombstone steals the breath from my lungs .
Her smiling face beams from the engraved photo , a bittersweet reminder of the beautiful person she was inside and out 1 kneel to set the bouquet down , blinking back the tears burning behind my eyes .
Wow , this is beautiful , I rasp , my throat right .
I cant believe Gray handled her funeral and burial arrangements all by himself .
But it seems he did an amazing job .
Im sure Mom would be proud of him .
He stands silent beside me , chewing on a rope of licorice .
His body is tense like hes fighting an ongoing battle in his head that hell never let anyone in on .
Hes not okay .
He hasnt been for a while , and being off his meds has only made it worse .
For both him , and everyone else around him , considering I just had to stop King from harming him .
I glance hack across the clearing, my gaze finding King , Mason , and Niko .
Mason leans casually against a tree while Niko sits in the grass , showing Zuri a purple flower .
But King his eyes are locked on us like a hawk , unwilling to let me out of his sight .
I feel like shit every day for letting you marry that sorry motherfucker , Gray mu mutters suddenly , his voice low and raw .
Tve been raising you since you were thirteen , and when Isaac asked to marry you , I saw it as a way to lighten the load .
I thought … I thought maybe I could finally focus on rebuilding the club .

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And because of me , you missed the last years of Moms life .
All that time , I thought you just tossed us aside , but it was really who did that .
Im so fucking sorry .
Alyssa .
I failed you ? I swallow hard , staring at Moms grave .
I forgave you a long time ago , Gray , I whisper .
Its not like you knew .
You wouldnt have just left me with him if you did .
He doesnt reply right away .
When he finally speaks , his voice is softer , Thanks , little sis I draw in a shaky breath , daring to voice a thought thats been weighing on my mind since I made the decision to come here .
Can 1 ..
be buried here 100 ? Next to Mom ? Grays head jerks towards me , his eyes blazing with emotion .
What the hell kind of question is that ? I smile faintly .
Just a feeling A constant feeling thats been gnawing , getting harder and harder to ignore as I feel my time running out .
Alyssa .
His voice is sharp , cutting through the air like a whip .
Why would you even say something like that ? Arent you pregnant right now ! Is that why King said you wouldnt talk about it ! You want to die ? Do I really need to have you admitted into a fucking psych ward ? His questions cause a laugh to bubble out of me that quickly morphs into a sob .
Thats the problem , Gray .
I dont want to die .
I have so much to Live for .
But when I signed that marriage license with Isaac , I might as well have signed a death wamant .
I can feel Grays barely restrained fury , but he doesnt interrupt .
Theres a reason no one has found him yet , I continue .
And when he finally comes for me , theyre going to lose me .
My voice trembles , and I 1/2 Chapter 99 glance at my three men in the distance playing with my daughter .
All of them Grays lips press into a hard line .
He serious right now .
You have an entire MC on your side , along with a man that was just willing to lose his fucking life over you .
Do you really think were going to fail at protecting you ! its not that you guys are going to fail , I reply , my heart breaking more and more by the second .
Its just you cant outrun the inevitable .
Isaac will catch up eventually .
Thats why I cant be happy about this baby , I dont even want King to be happy about this baby , because it will all be for nothing .
Isaac will kill us both Im just glad my boys have each other .
They wont have to grieve alone .
I dont realize Im crying until Grays arms are around me , holding me so tightly it feels like hes trying to keep me from completely falling apart .
Stop it , okay ? he growls , his voice thick with emotion .
Were going to catch that fucker .
Hell never lay another finger on you .
I wish he could keep that promise , but the weight crushing my chest says otherwise .
None of them ca Minutes past before I pull away , my tears finally drying up .
Grays eyes glisten as he blinks back tears of his own .
For the first time .
I notice how tired , overwhelmed and defeated he looks Maybe he needed this hug as much as I did .
1 embrace him again , tighter this time , pressing my cheek against his chest .
The tension seems to ease in his shoulders as he rubs my back , just like he did when we were kids .
Tell your wife to chill the fuck out , I murmur .
This baby thing shes pushing you too hard.
A heavy sigh escapes him .
Its fine .
I just want to make her happy .
But at what cost ? I know I should stay out of it , but maybe I need to have more words with her , even if it ends with me breaking one of the biggest club rules by punching her in the face this time , Gray shoves another piece of licorice into his mouth .
Its not like 1 dont want a baby too .
Its just not working out so far Theres always adoption .
Surrogacy .
You have options that dont involve stressing yourself out to death , Gray He hums softly in response , hopefully considering my words I lift my head , meeting his gaze .
Can you promise me something .
Just between us A flicker of unease crosses his features .
What is it ? A lump forms in my throat , but I force the words out around it .
When Isaac finds me , if he takes me … promise me youll keep them from coming after him .
Zuri loves them , all three of them .
I dont want her to lose all of us .
I cant imagine Zuri growing up g up without me .
But even worse , I cant imagine her not having any of us .
Grays jaw ticks , his eyes hardening .
For a moment , I think hes going to refuse .
But then his shoulders sag , and slowly , he nods reluctantly .
I promise .
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